做七十二变的成长型家长 | 清华附中国际部第十四期家长学校回顾

THIS Parent School

清华附中国际部家长学校

Summary

讲座概况

2019年11月1日，清华附中国际部第十四期家长学校在培训楼如期开讲。本期家长学校的主题是《做七十二变的成长型家长》，小学部心理老师陈开航担任主讲人，向家长介绍小学到高中三个阶段孩子的发展过程，以及这期间家长需要掌握的知识和采取的必要行动。

On November 1, 2019, the fourteenth lecture of the THIS Parent School was held in the training building. Ms. Chen delivered the lecture on the topic of becoming a growth mindset parent and helped parents understand the whole development process of their children. She also discussed the knowledge and necessary actions that parents need to master during this process.

本次讲座虽然围绕家长们最关切的主题，但内容却富有挑战性。原因有两点，首先孩子成长各阶段有不同的特点和挑战，而家长的需求也不尽相同。此外，本次家长学校涉及儿童期和青春期的性教育，这个话题对于很多家长来说比较敏感且很难从自身成长中汲取经验。开航老师在讲座中不仅讲解了理论知识，还手把手教给家长具体的实操方法。更难能可贵的是，开航老师为家长们准备了丰富的文字内容，讲座的幻灯片就是一部孩子性教育、亲密关系和成长教育的简明教科书，家长回家就可以参考使用。

The content of the lectures and discussion was challenging for two reasons. First of all, there are different characteristics and challenges in different stages of a child’s development and parents aren’t always aware of the variations making behaviors difficult to understand. And this lecture involved sex education in childhood and adolescence, which is quite sensitive to many Chinese parents. In the lecture, Ms. Chen not only gave parents theoretical knowledge, but also some practical methods for understanding and dealing with these topics. What's more, Ms. Chen prepared rich text content for parents. The slide of the lecture is a concise textbook of children's sex education and intimate relationship education, which is convenient for parents to use at home.

Highlights

讲座纪实

讲座的第一部分，开航老师首先向家长介绍了发展心理学中最经典的埃里克森的心理社会发展阶段理论。由此引出了性教育的基本原则和开展儿童性教育的重要性:

In the first part of the lecture, Ms. Chen introduced Eriksson's psychosocial development stage theory, which is the most classic one in developmental psychology. Parents were introduced to the basic principles of sex education with significant emphasis on the need to educate children about these principles:

性教育十分重要，它可以帮孩子减少很多麻烦。

Sex education is very important. It can help children avoid a lot of troubles.

性教育不仅仅是性生理教育，更是一个爱和亲密关系的整全教育和人格教育。

Sex education is not only the education of sexual physiology, but also the education of love and intimacy.

每个家庭都可以根据孩子的情况、家庭的文化，决定开展什么样的性教育。

Each family can decide what kind of sex education to carry out according to their children's situation and family culture.

性教育包含非常重要的预防性侵犯的教育。

Sex education includes the education on preventing sexual assault.

针对一些普适性问题，开航老师给出了如下建议：

In response to the common concerns of parents, Ms. Chen gave the following suggestions:

家长应直面孩子提出的问题，不扼杀他们的好奇心。

Parents should face up to their children's questions and encourage their curiosity.

家长需要提前储备好知识，以便当场回答孩子们的提问。不清楚如何回答时可以邀请孩子一起探索答案。

It is better for parents to accumulate knowledge in advance to answer the children's questions on the spot. When you don't know how to answer, invite your child to explore the answer together.

用孩子年龄可以理解的语言来解释。

Use the language that can be easily understood by your children.

不要把责任推给对方。问爸爸的问题，爸爸答，问妈妈的问题，妈妈答。

Be responsive. If father is asked, father should answer. If mother is asked, mother should answer.

性教育没有家长想像的那么难以启齿，孩子也不会学坏。联合国教科文组织的研究数据表明，接受过性教育的孩子，首次性行为的平均年龄会推迟。

Sex education is not as difficult as parents think, and children will not follow bad examples. According to UNESCO research data, the average age of first sexual activity for children who have received sex education will be significantly delayed compared to their counterparts who have not.

Q&A

家长提问摘要

讲座结束后，家长们踊跃提问，分享自己在进行亲密关系教育中遇到的困惑以及收获的经验。开航老师提出自己的见解，与家长一同探讨适合的解决方案。

After the lecture, parents actively asked questions on intimate relationship education. Ms. Chen shared her opinions and discussed appropriate solutions with them.

Q：我家孩子发育比别人晚，会不会因为性教育而提前发育并开始关注性？

My child develops later than his peers, will he develop ahead of time and start to pay attention to sex because of sex education?

A：不会。孩子会从比他发育早的同学那里听到各种信息。家长给的信息会更准确、对他更有好处。

No. Your child will be exposed to all kinds of information from those classmates who develop earlier than him. The information given by you is more accurate and beneficial to his development.

Q：用书来帮助孩子进行性教育好不好？

How about using books to give children sex education?

A：很好！除了借助书，还可以使用这次家长学校的PPT作为辅助工具。家长和孩子谈及性教育的时候可以把视线停留在书上，避免直视孩子产生的尴尬。

Good Idea! In addition to the help of books, parents can also use the PPT of today's Parent School as an auxiliary tool. When parents provide sex education, they can focus on books to avoid the embarrassment of eye contact with their children.

Parent Feedbacks

家长反馈

讲座结束后家长们意犹未尽，留在教室和开航老师继续探讨。家长们的书面反馈也极其的热烈和认真（下一期THIS家长学校的主题就会从其中产生哦）

Parents' written feedback was honest and sincere (Note: the topic of our next lecture will be selected from this feedback)

此次讲座我学到了性教育的知识，还有孩子的不同发展阶段。谢谢老师勇敢坦诚地分享自己的成长经验。

I learned the knowledge of sex education and the different stages of children's development in this lecture. Ms. Chen, thank you for sharing your own personal experience bravely and honestly with us.

我学到了性教育的沟通方法！

I have learned the communication method of sex education!

我学到了父母在日常生活中如何正确地、不逃避地和孩子谈论性的问题。我学到了如何告诉孩子什么是爱、什么是爱情、什么是好的爱，以及爱有哪些不同的方式和态度.

I learned how parents can talk about sex with their children correctly and openly in daily life. I learned how to tell children what is love between friends, what is love between spouses/lovers, what is good love, and what are the different ways to express love.

12月6日，本学期最后一期家长学校

我们，不见不散！

See you on the first Friday of December!

作者Writing|Hua Tang (THIS Parent)

图片Pictures| Hanyin Song

编辑Editing| Hanyin Song

审核Auditing| Jeff Joyce, Toni Dong, Lan Yi,Wenping Li